Before getting into our educational double feature, I must warn you that the bar for movies set in high school (yes, I know, BAD TEACHER is junior high) was set by Alexander Payne’s ELECTION (1999) and Lorie Scherfig’s AN EDUCATION (2009). The former is a brilliantly bitter black comedy (which, with the exception of the first two adjectives, BAD TEACHER aspires to be), and the latter a well-plotted character study, (which THE ART OF GETTING BY hopes it will be). Neither of them fails exactly as movies, but ART falls short because of a lack of depth in several areas and TEACHER just isn’t nasty enough, even though the commercials for it assure us it will be.
Not that BAD TEACHER doesn’t try. Just don’t blame Cameron Diaz. She plays a teacher named Elizabeth Halsey who quits her teaching job, is dumped by her ultra rich and mother-dominated (naturally) fiancé, and returns to the same school to replace a departing teacher. Once there, she sets her sights on her next meal ticket (Diaz’s ex, Justin Timberlake), sensitive substitute teacher Scott Delacorte, who’s coming off a broken relationship. Elizabeth comes to the conclusion that the best means of pursuing Delacorte is by enlarging her breasts, and the quest for funding for the surgery is what basically sets the movie’s plot in motion.
Not too unexpectedly, Elizabeth has competition for Delacorte’s hand from fellow oh-so-perky Amy Squirrel (I’m not kidding), and is pursued by a quasi-sensitive gym teacher (Jason Segel). She also befriends Lynne Davies (Phyllis Smith), the polar-opposite colleague friend that a movie like this needs.
Most of the problems in this movie can be blamed on how the screenplay handles character development (and, for that matter, plot development). The actors in this movie are better than the material given them, starting with Diaz. She is totally believable as a man-hunting vixen, but as written, it’s pretty much a one-note part, as can particularly be seen in the “resolution” near the end of the movie. The stunts she pulls to make money at school for her implants (how the money goes directly into her pocket and not the school’s is never really explained) are not all that shocking, like the scene where she manipulates her way into moderating a car wash, showing up in Daisy Dukes and baring her fearsome midriff and not resisting getting soaked with (lots of) water. At least she does play the role with enthusiasm, and with that, reveals another facet of her as an actress. (Revealing her legs and midriff helps immeasurably, too. There. I said it.)
Justin Timberlake’s performance of his character is so milque-toasty you expect him to melt into the ground. When he shows Diaz a picture of his bikini-clad ex, who broke up with him a year ago, he gets all pensive and says that the thing he misses most about her is her big…heart. Seriously, this seems like something that would be rejected by Saturday Night Live, and Timberlake plays it like he’s in a throwaway skit. The guy can certainly do better, as is evidenced by THE SOCIAL NETWORK. Judy Punch (Who’s British! Who knew?) is very amusing as Diaz’s romantic rival, but again, you’ve seen this character before- the teacher who blathers on about the wonderfully innovative (and hideously over-baked) ideas she implements in her classroom, ideas no self-respecting teacher would ever, ever do. (You’re going to have to trust me on this.) When she realizes that Diaz is a threat, she becomes determined to the point of sociopathy, becoming a junior high teacher version of Wile E. Coyote.
The character actors fare a bit better. Phyllis Smith is very sweet as the obligatory dowdy friend of the hot chick, making an art out of saying out loud the inner monologue of not only the angel on her right shoulder, but also the devil on her left whenever Diaz makes a suggestion to shake up her life. John Michael Higgins is restrained and very funny as the put-upon principal, and with Jason Segel’s gym teacher, are the closest characters actually approximating human behavior in the movie.
BAD TEACHER is not a horrible movie. There are a few witty points in the movie, including a pair of shots involving a license plate, and some of Diaz’s dialogue, including the constantly changing reason she gives for her fiancé dumping her (her idea, of course). If you wanted to see it based on the ads, you probably should, but just remember that the commercials make it seem more like a biting satire than it actually is.
(By the way, I saw a theatrical trailer for LARRY CROWNE, which is longer than the ubiquitous commercial shown on TV, and with a different tone. There are several shots that give the viewer the impression that Roberts’ teacher character is about as interested in teaching as Diaz’s is.)