Hey, I'm Ryan Michaels, a 14-year-old writing movie reviews for Heritage Newspapers. I've been doing it for three years, and enjoy it a lot. Here's my review of "Contagion."
In my time as amateur film critic and film connoisseur, I have to use the bathroom quite often. This seems a really bizarre place to start a movie review, but do you really expect anything too traditional from my end?
I say this not to shock or elicit a giggle, but because I had to go really freaking bad during the entirety of Steven Soderbergh's 105-minute disaster epic "Contagion." And you know what? I sat there the entire time, not really caring one way or another whether I was in fairly intense abdominal pain.
So gripping is his vision of society's meltdown that I thought to miss a frame would be a disservice. Can you tell me the last movie that pinned you to your seat like that?
"Contagion" is helmed by the man I believe to be American cinema's most exciting filmmaker, Steven Soderbergh. Throughout the years, the man has cranked out star-studded extravaganzas, documentaries, five-hour epics, explorations of eroticism, Julia Roberts vehicles and, I kid you not, an experimental drama with porn star Sasha Grey in the lead role.
The fact that his quality can be inconsistent misses the point. The man will do anything and everything, putting a distinctive stamp on anything he touches. With "Contagion," Soderbergh adds another notch to his belt: Master of terror.
Yeah, "Contagion" is the most terrifying movie of the year and pulls this off without so much as a jump-scare.
Watching as people are chased with knifes and chainsaws can be scary, but considering that most level-headed individuals have not had such an experience, there's a degree of distance to the proceedings.
What if something so simple as a touch or a cough could have you contract a virus, putting you and anyone you contact six feet under? And, furthermore, what happens when it spreads all over the world until there isn't any more room six feet under?
These are only some of the questions "Contagion" answers, with a very deliberate, realistic style courtesy of "Bourne Ultimatum" scribe Scott Burns. Burns extensively researched his material for the film, even working with the Center for Disease Control to create an authentic virus. Although occasionally at the expense of organically developed dialogue, authenticity pays off handsomely, never calling to attention its status as a multimillion-dollar blockbuster with an Oscar winner in almost every frame.